Yeah, some people just said that it's just number, but I think it's something more than that. Age-wise, the number is increasing, means that I already lived in this world for 29 years. But time-wise, my living quota on this earth is decreasing by one more year. Yeah, no one know for certain of when we will die, but there's nothing wrong to always "just in case", even though my management background keep telling me to always "Just in time".
I don't actually know why do I don't like birthday so much. Maybe it's because that one faithful year when I receive one suicide attempt as my birthday gift. Well, the darkest year everrrrrr..... and up until now, at some point I sometimes loose the confidence in me and think that "What makes me so special?"
Year is just a matter of number and I always have this jargon of "Live life to its fullest" and I think to myself, "Why I can't even enjoy myself of this faithful day of the year?"
To think back again on a motivational story, our birthday is actually a day when we should be celebrating the day of our Glorious Win. Our conceiving process itself is already a winning story where we defeat other sperms in the race to reach the one ovum. Finally when we finally success to be born in this life, is another winning story on its own. So birthday is celebrating that day.
Is that so?
Yeah, maybe I don't feel that special... I might be just a lucky sperm to ever reach the ovum because of the other sperms are lost. hahahaha....
Well, to think that once again...
The day of my birthday is November 4, and I was staying in my mother's womb for about 9 months and 9 days. So the day I was conceived was around January 25. Based on Islam believed about soul, that God put soul in me after 40 days since the Sperm meet the Ovum. So based on that random calculation, my original birthday should be on March 7 not November 4. Because that's the real first time I was sent to this world. hahaha....
Maybe based on that random calculation, someone should made an apps on that.
I sometimes feel that I have an old soul inside me and now I hate that the age is actually catching up. No I'm old inside and out. Well, 29 is not that old, but still I feel like now I should have been like more mature or something and I don't feel like it. Maybe I really do wish that my age is stopped at 25 and I'll be 25 for the rest of my life until I die... hahaha...
Nothing is actually change even though my age is one more year added. I'm still me, as awkward as possible me. Because I always believed that "There's no point in growing up if you can't be childish once in a while..."
But by being 29, there's a responsibility for a person with this age, especially coming from Indonesian culture. The pressure of getting married will be more and more crazy. Well, not that I'm surprised since this pressure has been on me since I step on my 25 years of living on earth.
Now that I think of it, why do I make it so gloomy about my birthday. Maybe it also the first time after several time celebrating it with my special someone. Damn it, I really should've getting use to this. Life is changing all the time. Well it might be catching up to me too fast and I'm not ready.
As a tradition, I always removed my birthday from my facebook on the 1st of November. I'm (not) sorry, but I don't want my Facebook wall is crowded by thousands, eh no... hundreds, not really, tens (quite right) of my not-so-close Facebook contact. So I always removed it near the day. I just want the one who write on my wall is someone who really remember my birthday, which will really means a lot to me because they actually remember it or the one who care to check on my Facebook wall.
And also I'm not too keen on too much festivity, hahaha....
I don't want that some people conspire behind my back and then throw me some flour and egg, OMG, that is so high-school. But I don't know it's a sad story or a good one, but I never had that experience. Either my circle of friends are too serious or they're just don't feel that close to me to do that. hahahaha....
Meh... birthday....
There are 250 millions people in Indonesia, if it divide by the number of days in a year 365, it will resulted the number around 684,931 something. So it means, by average it should be 684 thousands people having the same birthday. But I only found maybe only 3 people that share the date and month of my birthday. I always thought that November 4 is an exclusive date... hahaha... or I'm just simply not having much friends...
For that, to my (not so much in number) friends that has been congratulate me on my birthday either because you really are remember it or because of you really are trying to find it out, all I can say is THANK YOU... and shhhh, keep it a secret...
For my housemates + 1, the Ice Cream cake is like super nice!!! Thanks.
For you, who are the first person that congratulate me, a special smooch from here.
My wish this year is still the same like all the previous years, "Give me the power to read minds....but with my hair still intact" hahahaha.....
Image source:
http://www.ad-card.com/images/Auto-Service-Marketing-29-Years.png
No comments:
Post a Comment